Photo credit: Zazzel.com

Last Tuesday marked the 1^st anniversary of my when my brother Ed took his own life. That day plunged me back into a familiar darkness. I transformed back into a walking bruise. Every thought, movement, and breathe pained me. To my surprise, slipping back into depression and deep grieving was as easy as slipping into an old comfy sweater. It felt like home.

Midway through drowning in my tears I had a glaring moment of clarity. I made the mistake of focusing on what his death took from me and I was ignoring the gifts it gave me.  The little box of darkness we are left with after the losing a loved one to death or an ended relationship is filled with blessons (blessings and lessons). In order to receive them you need to be brave enough to face your heartache and view the grief as a gift.

The moment I did this my tears made way for smiles. When I opened my gift of loss I learned:
-There is hope and healing available if you are open to receive it
-How to best serve others
-There is light at the end of every tunnel
-My life’s purpose

The truth is, after a significant loss you will never be the same. The good news is you can be BETTER! Use your heartache as a platform to build your new authentic purpose filled life. The mandatory first step is deciding that you do not want to suffer anymore. When you consider this idea you will initially feel guilty. Rest assured that choosing to let go of your suffering is not betraying your lost loved one. On the contrary, it means you are honoring them by elevating yourself from merely existing to actually living.

A loss should challenge you to live your life at the highest level. To embrace this challenge untie the bow, open the gift, and allow the contents to lead you to true peace and happiness.

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