Thriving Through A Trauma Anniversary
I thought I could avoid the sadness that has been creeping up as the anniversary of my brother’s passing approaches, but then it happened. I cried…. in the middle of Walmart. As a flood of memories hit me, I experienced what psychologists often call the “anniversary reaction.” As a death or other trauma type anniversary approaches, many survivors report a return of depression, anxiety, and PTSD which can last several days or weeks. On a HOPE filled note, the anniversary reaction is also an opportunity for healing. This post breaks down the positives and negatives of these difficult days and arms you with support you need.
It is important to note that not all survivors of a traumatic event experience an anniversary reaction. Those who do, however, may be troubled because they did not expect or do not understand their reaction. For these individuals, knowing what to expect in advance may be helpful. Common anniversary reactions among survivors of a loss or traumatic event include:
- Recurring Memories and Dreams:
Replaying memories, thoughts, and dreams about the event that are difficult to turn off are common. These reactions may be as vivid on the anniversary as they were at the actual time of the disaster or traumatic event.
- Fear and Anxiety:
Fear and anxiety may resurface leading to jumpiness, startled responses, and vigilance about safety. These feelings may be particularly strong for individuals who are still working through the grieving process.
- Frustration, Anger, and Guilt:
The anniversary may reawaken anger about what was lost or taken and frustration with the slow process of healing. Individuals may also experience survivor’s guilt. Honor all feelings that come up but do not let them consume you.
- Remembrance:
Many survivors welcome the cleansing tears, commemoration, and fellowship that the anniversary day offers. Taking this time to honor the memory of what/who was lost can be therapeutic. Consider lighting a candle, sharing favorite memories and stories, attending a spiritual service or releasing balloons.
- Reflection:
The reflection brought about by a trauma anniversary is often a turning point in the recovery process. It is an opportunity for people to look back over the past year, recognize how far they have come, and appreciate the courage and the resiliency that has been shown.
The truth is, after a traumatic event or loss you will never be the same. The good news is, with time and support, you can be BETTER! If you are having trouble coping, ask for help! Consult a counselor or mental health professional. In the workplace, you may be able to get assistance from your human resources department or your company’s Employee Assistance Program.
Photo Credit: indigolifeonline.com Content Credit: counselingtools.com
